I Didn’t Know I Was Stuck In a Rut Until I Started to Climb Out

(I know you might be expecting Disney pictures and stories…and trust me I have LOTS of them to share, but for now would you allow me to share a little of what’s on my heart with you? It seems important to get this out first before I post about Blissdom or The Disney Social Media Moms Celebration or any of our daily life adventures. I think it will help me as I start climbing out of this rut that I’ve fallen into.)

Have you ever found yourself stuck in a rut and you had no clue you were in one? 

Or where it started? 

Or what caused it?

Somewhere in the daily tasks and responsibilities I’ve lost sight of what life is really about…

Somewhere amidst the chores, the financial uncertainties of unemployment, the expectations, commitments, physical challenges, the disappointments of not feeling like I was doing anything well, the pressures, the failures,and other distractions, I allowed negativity to drag me into its ugly pit. 

The sins of selfishness, impatience, and pride have been far too evident in my interactions and attitude. 

And somehow I didn’t see it coming.  Somehow I didn’t notice how far I had fallen.

(Enter: Disney World. The happiest place on earth, after all!)

Surrounded by my dear sweet men for a week, away from the daily routines of life, I watched them with smiles and wonder plastered on their faces.  I worked together with my #1 teammate in life under stressful and tiring circumstances, and watched us grow as a couple.  I celebrated our family experiencing a “normal” family vacation. I was encouraged by other bloggers and positive social media influencers. I took in the pure happiness of childhood. I breathed it in….And Boy, did it feel good!

So now as I make my “re-entry” into reality it’s become apparent that I was in a serious RUT.  And now I’m bound and determined to climb my way out. 

There are changes I need to make.  Things I need to do better.  Ways that I need to grow.  Priorities that need shifted. Apologies to be made. Realizations to digest.

When did I get so serious?  When did I allow things to overwhelm me to the point of despair? When did I let tasks and responsibilities steal my enjoyment in life? How did I become so self-focused?

It’s frustrating and upsetting….but on the other hand it’s motivating.

I’m pretty sure there’s a lot of JOY ahead in this journey… along with fist pumping, uncontrollable giggling, tender moments, quiet understandings, love taps, silliness, letting go, and investing in others.

There’s more of my heart that needs filling.

hearthole

 Proverbs 15:13,15b “A joyful heart makes a cheerful face, But when the heart is sad, the spirit is broken…A cheerful heart has a continual feast.”