Covenant Relationship

marriage post2

Although I had the greatest intentions to sit down and hash out a much overdue Keepin’ It Real Rewinds post, I’d like to share something that’s been on my heart the past couple of days.  Now let me warn you things that come out of my heart and onto the computer screen are not always communicated in the clearest fashion, so just hear me out for a few paragraphs as I dive into a very sensitive topic.

Lately I can hardly turn the corner without be asked to discuss the marriage of a well known reality mother.  While I have no intentions of blogging about their personal decisions, speculating their failures, or discussing the unknown details surrounding the destruction of a fellow family of multiples (whom I’ve never met), it has led to very thought provoking conversations on marriage and children.  And it has caused my heart to be heavy, not only for this particular family, but for those who are facing or who have faced the ugly scars of divorce.

No one walks down the aisle, adorned like a princess thinking, “I really hope this ends in divorce”. 

No one fathoms as they hold their swaddled newborn baby for the first time, “I wonder if I’ll have partial custody?” 

Of course not, but somewhere after the size 0-3 onesies have been boxed up (or perhaps before), marriage enters its own test of “reality”.  A reality that includes strains on communication, intimacy, attention, and time. 

Brad and I dated for 6 years (high school sweethearts) {insert awwwwws} before we wed.  We were the best of friends, we had spent an enormous amount of time together as a couple, we had completed counseling with our pastor, as well as prepared for marriage through an engaged couples class.  However, nothing could have completely prepared us for the stress of quadruplets on a marriage. Nor could the newlywed bliss compare with the deep respect that I have gained for my husband through the challenges of parenting. Marriage has been a journey. And it’s a journey I plan to continue for life. 

For Brad and I, divorce is not an option.  It’s not in our vocabulary.  We don’t even joke about it. We are in a covenant relationship.

However, do I think we are above the sins and mistakes that lead to divorce?  Absolutely not.  This is where I think many of us “Christians” have been fooled.  Our pride has deceived us from thinking it could happen to us. We’ve trusted ourselves as not weak enough to require accountability.  We’ve danced around the idea that marriage is loving your husband even when he leaves his socks on the floor, or when he squeezes the tube of toothpaste the wrong way. How many marriages have ended over socks or toothpaste, anyway?  I’m going out on a limb and saying very few.  Rather I think there are deeper issues that drive us to destroy a relationship (and the many others who lives are affected by our decisions).

Pride. Anger. Jealousy. Deceit. Discontentment. Selfishnessto name a handful.

And how quickly they can consume a marriage!

marriage post1

I am sure that I have just a small grasp of the true picture of a marriage covenant in the six short years we’ve been married. What I have experienced is that marriage is much more than saying  “I Do” in a stunning white gown. Instead, marriage is a series of “I Do(s)” 

I DO forgive you for hurting me.

I DO choose to overlook your flaws and concentrate on your goodness.

I DO respect you as my husband.

I DO take responsibility for my actions.

I DO choose to love you above my children. (And to quit feeling guilty for doing so…)

I DO commit to you today, as I promised on our wedding day.

I pray this has somehow encouraged you today.  Let me leave you with a few resources that can communicate Biblical marriage much better than I could ever articulate.  First start off with a Study Bible. (I recommend this one.) These are great scripture references on this topic: Ephesians 5:22-32, and I Peter 3:1-7.  A few books that would be encouraging resources would include: The Excellent Wife by Martha Peace, Feminine Appeal by Carolyn Mahaney, Respectable Sins by Jerry Bridges, and Disciplines of a Godly Woman by Barbara Hughes.

I would love to keep this conversation going in the comment section of this post.  Let’s encourage one another! 

69 thoughts on "Covenant Relationship"

  1. That was BEAUTIFUL Mur! I love that it was straight from your heart, just perfect.

    Love you!
    XOXO
    Gen

  2. {Kimber} says:

    I found your blog through another..but in all honesty I think the Lord directed me to this very post…bc I needed it…badly…especially today!
    This was a fabulous post–thank you!

  3. Jenny B says:

    Jen…so beautifully put. I agree with you 100% on this matter. I love how God uses you to bless others through this blog.:)
    Very encouraging.

    Jenny B

  4. BreezieGirl says:

    Thank you for sharing your HEART with all of us and for working at I DO every day.

    This was a beautiful entry.

  5. Anonymous says:

    I like to say marriage is full of compromises and we do have to work at.

  6. Fantastic post!!! This is such a sensitive, emotional topic. You handled it really well.

    I have been married for 12+ years and it is not easy!! But having divorce as "not an option" makes us determined to stick the "I dos." But it is hard some days. Really hard.

  7. Jill says:

    Just thought I would throw another book out there that can be a huge blessing to marriage (young or old)….Red Hot Monogamy by Bill and Pam Farrel.

    Thanks for sharing. Well said.

  8. Jen Wilson says:

    VERY well said, Jen.

    I didn't even think about other multiple moms being questioned in response to the Famous Multiple-parent Break-up. Thank you for writing such a great post!

  9. Anonymous says:

    Having gone through inferlity issues, I also believe those couples sometimes not alway form stronger bonds.

  10. Our church is doing a series during the month of August on relationships. It's entitled "How to Kill Relationships and Irritate People." We laugh at the title, but the messages have been very convicting. The first one was on PRIDE, and the second was on ANGER. It's funny that your post goes right along with this series. (No coincidence, I am sure!) I am anxious to hear what comes next (in the sermon series), as we can apply these teachings to all relationships that we have, be it as a spouse, a parent, a friend, etc. If you're interested in hearing some additional, solid, Biblical teaching on these areas, I would encourage you to check out our church website (www.yourchurch.com) and listen to the messages. (I know…this is a shameless plug!)

    Also, speaking of books, another great one is "Created to Be His Help Meet" by Debi Pearl. (www.createdtobehishelpmeet.org). And, an excellent (and overwhelming – in a good way) Bible study is "Five Aspects of Woman" by Barbara Mouser.

    Jen, great discussion – thanks for sharing!

  11. Stephanie says:

    I am a single mother that has never been married…I can only pray that I have the love, confindence, courage, and admiration that the two of you have when I get married! I know things are not always perfect, but your covenant relationship shows in every post and story you share!
    Thank you for being so open and sharing your heart, family, and soul with us!!

  12. Deanna says:

    Amen, girl! Well said…. and well lived! My hubby and I are joining you and yours in allowing our marriage to be a testimony to the world of HIS love and grace and mercy. We may not do it perfectly, but we are redeemed through Him! There is no better way to live! :)

  13. WoW…first thank you for writing such an excellant post on how reality hits when the I do's are said. I am amazed at how you guys have a covenant to eachother and how divorce is not an option. I truly believe this post has helped me understand a bit more about marriage.
    ~Elyse

  14. Mikaila says:

    VERY encouraging! I am not married (yet) but my boyfriend and I often talk about these very points and how love is a CHOICE.

    Thanks for putting this out there for others to read. :)

  15. jag says:

    WELL said, Jen. Thanks for a great post that I'm certain to reflect on often.

  16. Anonymous says:

    Loved it! My husband and I feel the same that divorce is not an option for us. It is sad to see people we love divorce. You have to keep the lines of communication opened in a marriage and know that you're in this together!

    Mommy of five in IL (Paola)

  17. Devin says:

    That was VERY well written, Jen, and I couldn't agree more. I especially liked your list of "I Do's". How accurate! And, I wanted to agree with the other commenter–Red Hot Monogamy is a wonderful book. I was able to hear both of the authors speak at a conference, and you can just see their passion for keeping couples not only together, but thriving in marriage!

  18. Anonymous says:

    We are studying the book on Respectable Sins in our Sunday School class. What an awesome book and truly eye-opening. Thanks for sharing. What an encouragement.

  19. Andrea says:

    Beautiful, Jen.

  20. Brittany says:

    Red Hot Manogamy IS a good read. I've heard them speak too and they're funny, insightful, inspiring, and the book is a very easy read for husbands and wives both.

    We like the book and video titled Love and Respect. It's a good one too. My husband doesn't like books and authors that demean the male spouse. It happens often. The author of Love and Respect doesn't do that. So, it's a series we both enjoyed a lot and learned a lot from.

  21. My Goodness says:

    Amen and AMEN!!!

    Marriage is taken too lightly…disposable, even. It's sad.

    I LOVE my marriage…even on the days when we test each other in a major way. God put us together (we dated for six years, high school sweethearts like you guys) and we will NOT break the vows we made to God and each other!!

  22. Rachel E. says:

    Well said!!! I am not married (yet) but love the way you put your I DOs and will definitely keep those in mind as I prepare my heart for marriage someday.

  23. While I completely and whole heartedly agree with your post, I have a dilema. My husband and I are both Christian in our own way. Neither attend church and are from very different religious backrouds. This poses a small problem with books such as "I Do" I have read it and loved the message about marriage, but was a little put off by the promises about God, I wasnt raised in a religion where this was worded quite that way.

    Basically what Im asking is: Do you have any suggestions for books that are marriage tools, that are not so obviously religion focused?

    We loved the movie Fireproof, we love 5 Love languages.

    Thank you much! And I love your blog!!

  24. I have to say a big yeah for the line about loving your husband ABOVE your children. I hear a lot of people that talk about their children "being their everything or their world" and that they love them more than anything else. Not true for me. I have no shame about saying that I love my husband more than my children and want to keep it that way. He is and I pray always will be my favorite person on the planet.

    theanswertowhy.wordpress.com

  25. Suz says:

    Absolutely beautiful post – I do choose to clean my kitchen because clean counters make my husband happy. Thank you for reminding me WHY I do it.

  26. Chelsa says:

    great post :) so much truth in there!

  27. Clair says:

    Great post! Thanks!

  28. Incredible post! I always love your honesty. We, like you & Brad, are in this for the long haul…and I couldn't agree more with your "I do" list! Hugs!!!!!

  29. KSDallas says:

    I am also a single mother that has never been married, but I am in the 3rd year of a relationship with the man of my dreams. No he isn't perfect but I love him dearly. I often get asked when we are getting married. We have a great relationship and although yes I do plan to marry him someday, I do not understand why everyone is in such a hurry. My brother has 3 ex-wives and he married everyone of them within 4 months of knowing them. Of course they all ended in divorce within a few years.

    I have to say that I really admired what you said about loving your husband above your children. I think a lot of marriages go south when the children are put above the relationship.

    This was a great post and I think you touched a lot of people – even if it is just giving them the opportunity to talk about their own issues.

    Krista

  30. Anonymous says:

    What a great post. My husband & I were also highschool sweethearts and were married after 7 years together. I thought we were in it for the long haul too.
    Unfortunately divorce is not always the choice of both partners!!
    My husband met someone else (at the office) & decided she, without years of fertility treatments & depression to go along with them, was a better option.
    I had no idea that there were any issues with our marriage, I was newly pregnant with our miracle baby, & I was blindsided. I still sometimes wonder what happened 9 years later!!
    I greatly admire your & Brad's attitude towards marriage & I hope that if I ever meet another man I want to marry that we can have the same kind of relationship.
    Sorry this got so long!!
    Helen in Australia

  31. Ivy says:

    Great post! So encouraging and I couldn't agree more.

  32. Erin says:

    I've been following your blog for a long time, but this is the first time I've been prompted to post a comment. My hubby and I are currently going through infertility treatments, and our marriage become stronger every day because of the trials we face. We know that the journey of parenting will be even more challenging than infertility, and it's wonderful to hear the respect and love you two have for each other! Thanks for the encouragement and the Godly example you two are living out. Love it.

  33. Lindsay says:

    Thanks for a great post, Jen. I had a wonderful childhood, even though my mother has been divorced three times. I would never question or doubt her reasons for divorce, but I do have to say it makes my marraige stronger. I refuse to give up, even at the worst of times and even as my husband and I change as we "grow up." We were high school sweethearts too, and have pretty much grown up together since we were 17! I think it is refreshing that you blogged about something so close to the heart. I have never blogged about the trials of marraige, but I definitely live them! I couldn't agree with your post more.
    Lindsay
    http://www.punkinandbean.blogspot.com

  34. Lauren says:

    I am young (22) wife and mother with 2 sons (1 and 2) and another baby on the way. My husband and I were married at the ages of 19 and barely 20 after dating for 2 1/2 years. We received a lot of opposition that we took into great consideration concerning our age. However, we made a promise to each other just as you have talked about. The pastor who did our counseling and ceremony gave us the idea to hang our vows up on the wall in our bedroom. Everyday we see the promise we made to each other plain as day on the wall. It was a wonderful idea that I would recommend! Do you remember the vows that you made to your husband on your wedding day?

  35. What a great post! Thanks for sharing. We all need to be mindful that divorce CAN happen to anyone-we need to make sure we're doing all we can to preserve our marriages. Thanks for the reminder.

  36. Anonymous says:

    What I unfortunately learned, as someone else has posted, is that you can chose to say divorce is not as option for you, individually.

    Divorce was not an option for me. However, my ex-husband decided it was an option for him. I cannot fight it, as it is a legal action brought against me. No judge is vested in keep two people together so no matter what I would have said or how hard I would have fought, the divorce would have been granted.

    I really hate to be a wet blanket, but for those of us who have been there, it is hurtful to see someone saying "It's not an option for us" as to say that those who have the misfortune of going through it chose that route, that I somehow just wasn't committed enough. I certainly wouldn't have willfully chosen this. It was, however, best for my children and I to be removed from the unstable and at time dangerous situation we were in.

    I do understand that this isn't exactly "encouraging" so I won't be offended at all if you chose delete this.

  37. CBW says:

    Being 30 and still single – this gives a girl hope. After already seeing friends' marriages failed, or in a continual state of misery, it has made me doubt if it realy does exist, if it can really be done. My parents are still married, but completely miserable. I do know for a fact that having God be number one in your relationship is a big factor, if not the most important factor – a factor that most that I know, don't have.
    Thanks for the post. I've never commented before – I just love seeing your precious boys grow up, as I am completely facinated with mutiples, have been ever since I can remember!
    You are a wonderful writer, keep up the good work and thanks for the hope.

  38. ASHENFELTERS says:

    VEry well said! My husband and I have been married 10 years in January and have 5 little ones. Life is crazy busy!:) One thing I want to add. Love is NOT a feeling all the time, it is a choice. There are times where I do not feel like loving my husband but because of the vows I made, I CHOOSE to show him love anyway. Also, focusing(and even writing out,on the really hard days)on his GOOD qualities really helps me keep my perspective. And lastly, remembering, it is NOT about me. There is no room for selfishness. If I serve him in love, he naturally reacta in serving me too.:) Thanks for being so open and honsest! I love your blog!

  39. Tricia says:

    Thanks for writing about this. I'm a blog stalker and we'll probably never meet b/c I'm way down here in Texas. BUT I know you have a huge audience and it's great to share this truth. My parents always said the same thing to us "Divorce is not an option" and we trusted that. However, they put us kids above each other and undermined that commitment to their marriage. After over 30 years of marriage, they spent 3 years in a not-friendly divorce and can now hardly be near each other. It stinks. BUT it taught my siblings and me that we have to actually work at this thing. One thing my hubby and I do is date night. Even when it's not easy and the kids don't want us to go. Even when there's not a dollar left in the budget. Even when we don't feel like spending time together. We go. And it's always worth it.

    Thanks again for sharing : )

  40. Anonymous says:

    Hey Jen! Thanks for writing this. You brought me to tears with the "I dos"! It's not easy, actually people should just say it's hard….but it SO rewarding, and as the years go by, the love gets deeper and stronger. Love ya!!

    ~Anna Benzing Cast

  41. Robin says:

    Thanks for this post. I'm going through the Excellent Wife now with a small group of ladies…it's been hard, convicting…..but all worth it if it changes me to be a better wife. :)

  42. HoundDogMom says:

    Jen, as I have stated before when posting I don’t have multiples but so enjoy reading about your wonderful boys. This post is wonderful and every marriage is different that is for sure. I sure wish my husband I would have been high school sweethearts. We met when we were 17 (my husband) and 18 (me), wild and crazy teenagers found ourselves with a little one just 6 months after we were dating. He was very serious about beginning our lives because he would not walk away from his child (he came from a divorced family). We were married when I was 6 months pregnant and have been together ever since. Everyone told us it would not last 6 months and we just celebrated our 28th year of marriage and have one son (28) and 4 hound dogs. We decided we could barley take care of ourselves and a young baby so we decided to not have anymore.

    My grandparents and parents give me the courage and strength that marriage is worth its struggle in gold. My grandparents were married 60 years and my parents just celebrated their 50th. It definitely takes two people to keep a marriage strong and alive. I am so thankful my husband was one that did not want to follow in his parents footsteps when it came to marriage, he broke that cycle.
    Anyway, thanks for sharing your feelings from your heart. It was wonderful.

    Sherri (Mom to 1 son and 4 hound dogs)

  43. Alisha says:

    I don't think I've commented before but I totally agree with you. Divorce is not an option for us and I think when you choose that you make the conscience effort to choose to be happy. Sometimes it is easier than others but when you know you are in it through thick and thin you seem to work a tad harder and it *does* pay off.

    I also would like to shout from the mountaintops Yes! Yes! Yes! about putting your marriage and spouse ahead of your children. To have a sucessful marriage your partner must come first. Otherwise you are almost idolizing your children – which is obviously putting them ahead of your spouse and God.

    Fantastic post!
    Lots of Love and best wishes from a faithful follower and reader.
    Alisha

  44. Mom 4 Kids says:

    Beautifully said! The un-named reality family's situation is sad and we can all learn from their personal situation. Again, well said and thanks!

  45. Suzanne says:

    preach on, sister. true-er words have ne'er been spoken. what a beautifully honest and open post. love you!
    suz

  46. Anonymous says:

    Yesterday my husband and I celebrated our 42nd wedding anniversary. Our marriage has faced and "survived" just about every kind of difficulty you can imagine – even a 2 year agreed upon living separately period. What I think I've learned most of all is that when a marriage is centered on God's love it CAN survive. I truly believe our 42 years together is a gift from God to us. I like to call that gift length of years. In the end that is what we have had and every year going forward is just another gift that we have to share together. Commitment is a 2 way street and I thank God every day that my husband and I have shared the same commitment to our God who created us and to each other. It is truly a priceless gift.

  47. Lindsay says:

    To the anonymous person who said that their divorce helped them escape an unstable and potentially dangerous situation: I believe in some situations, divorce can be necessary. My mom was abused by my stepfather, both verbally and physically. He made her life miserable for thirteen years, then fraudently used her name to get a bunch of credit cards which drove her into bankruptcy! Her three children, including myself, were certainly better off after we left that situation. I had a wonderful childhood, despite these things, because of my strong, smart mother…which is what you probably are too! Never be ashamed of doing the right thing for your children. The key to having the type of marraige that Jen writes about is finding a partner who believes the same thing! I don't think anyone would want your comment deleted because you also were speaking from the heart. Women need to support each other!

  48. Anonymous says:

    After 32 of a wonderful marriage to my high school best friend (we did not date until after high school but were best friends during) we are finding ourselves living apart because of a job situation. It is the hardest part of our marriage yet but we do enjoy our reunions ;).

  49. Carey says:

    This post was so good and so true!!! I actually just posted something I read the other day that really touched me and challenged me in my marriage. It is much to long to leave in a comment box but anyone who would like to read it can go here

    http://providence-carey.blogspot.com/2009/08/mindset-of-marriage.html

  50. Krissy says:

    Just finished leading 9 other ladies in the Feminine Appeal study. Highly recommend the book-it stirred up great conversation and caused us all to look at our attitudes toward our husbands…while much can be debated about the actual book, the Word of God can stand up for itself, and like Elizabeth Elliot said, "The Bible does not have footnotes."

    I am sure you post is a great encouragement to many women out there. Thanks for sharing your heart.

  51. Erin Powell says:

    Great work Jen! We also attend College Park and are going through the "How to Kill Relationships and Irritate Someone" series. It's SO easy with multiple small children to grease the squeaky wheel and one's priorities can quickly and easily become kids-husband-God, totally backwards! It's a daily struggle to reverse it to God, then husband, then kids…

  52. mamalouise says:

    This was PERFECTLY put. Thank you for being so honest!

  53. Mandi says:

    Thanks, Jen! I, too, have never commented before but love reading (my older son is the same age as your boys- it's fun because they are doing, saying, interested in the same things.) Thanks for the reminder of what's important. I am deeply saddened by the turn of events for the unnamed reality couple and the effect it will have on those children. I do pray, however, that God will use this situation for good, and cause many couples to look at and evaluate their own relationships, becoming stronger and more committed to each other. Some days, I have to remind myself, "Love is a choice! What are you going to choose today?" And of course, I choose to love my husband. Keep up the writing from your heart!

  54. Anonymous says:

    IF you found your husband cheating on YOU, wouldn't you opt to divorce?? Afterall, the Bible even says you can divorce if there is unfaithfulness (Matt. 5:31,32; 19:9).

  55. Anna says:

    I really needed to read that and couldn't agree more. Thank you.

  56. MckMama says:

    Encouraging! Inspirational! Truth in words! God breathed! Awesome! Thanks;)

  57. Candace says:

    Great post! I kept waiting for this. Everything you wrote is exactly the way my marriage is. We choose to keep the I Do and divorce is never an option. We leave it out and I think b/c of that our marriage is stronger and our son can see that and feel that.

  58. Candace says:

    Great post! I kept waiting for this. Everything you wrote is exactly the way my marriage is. We choose to keep the I Do and divorce is never an option. We leave it out and I think b/c of that our marriage is stronger and our son can see that and feel that.

  59. Christina says:

    I read your blog but I don't think that I have commented before! I love to read about your little one and all that you go through with quads. I went through a small bit of infertility and ended up with 1 truly wonderful child.

    Marriage is so full of ups and down. We met and wed with in 6 months. There were a lot of people that told us it would never last. I was 20, he was 26. We have been together for 15 years, married for 14years. We have worked hard and made many mistakes. But we were both committed to our marriage and making it work. Divorce is not an option that either one of us would ever want.

    Anyways, all of this to say that this is a great post. Thanks for sharing your thoughts and you blog.

  60. istillbelieve says:

    Absolutely amazing! The 'I DO' part was an eye opener…especially the "love you above my children" part! Your blog is so fun and your family is so precious! Thanks so much for sharing your thoughts!

  61. Anonymous says:

    We included the pledge to never divorce in our wedding vows..

    Another good book is Creative Counterpart and for the life of me I can't remember the author or find the book… should be easy enough to find though

  62. I see your heart. Thanks for sharing your encouragement.

    When you read it for what it is, it is really quite encouraging.

    I am reading a little late – that picture of Henry in the costume is a.d.o.r.a.b.l.e.!

  63. Lauren says:

    Jen, I love how open and honest you are, and I applaud your commitment to your marriage. You are so right that Christians fall into a trap of thinking they are above succumbing to divorce. I have been in my covenanted marriage for 2 years, 1 month, so far. No kids, but we are about to be certified foster parents, and we understand it will be a test for our marriage, but like you and Brad, we are committed to each other 110%. Something we do that we feel helps us is to have boundaries which we consistently bring up with one another and evaluate together (such as no being alone with someone of the opposite sex, keeping phone conversations with the opposite sex short [and sometimes in front of each other], etc). There's a lot of work in communicating with a spouse, but it is worth EVERY SECOND. You go, girl. :)

  64. Cyn says:

    Well timed and beautifully written! Proud that you followed the Holy Spirit's urging to write this particular post!
    BLESSINGS!!

  65. a.hurrle@yahoo.com says:

    Research shows (sorry I can't site the source, it's from a published Christian author Sue McRoberts)that married couples of multiples are 50% more likely to get divorced than married couples with singletons, and mothers of multiples are 5 times more likely to have post partum depression. I'm a mother of multipe boys too, and my story starts out very similarly to your and your husband's relationship, pre-marriage counseling, 3 year courtship and 10 years friendship prior to that, our faith. I also, experienced a time of infertility, but Thanks be to God, conceived twins naturally. Our boys are a handful and can be so straining on a marriage, we have a beautiful younger daughter too. Do fertility doctors warn patients about the extreme stresses of raising multiples? If not, should they? Or would it fall upon deaf ears because these couples so despirately want to have their own children? We were to the point of talking adoption, rather than fertility treatments. ALL children are a gift from God, no matter how they come to us, because God makes good out of everything, even when we go against HIS will for our lives. I truly hope to get some advice about this, because yes, like you say, marriage is a covenant to God and should be taken very seriously, but SO many couples of multiples are struggling. I'm very passionate about this and want to help people, but fear being taken wrong (remember, I too experienced the pain of infertility and couldn't imagine my life without a housefull of children). I'd just like to see that it's manditory for infertile couples going through treatments to conceive, be counseled and perhaps followed up on through the years, for marriage support. Do fertility doctors not care about the health of the relationship that will nurture and raise the products of his/her work? I pray you won't be offended by my post, I know this is a very sensitive and contriversial topic and I won't win any popularity contests. From the bottom of my heart I just would love to help people, but I need more information. Hearing of your faith, I'm hoping you would understand and be open and willing to discuss this with me. I wouldn't even try with someone not Christian.
    Best wishes! You have a beautiful family!

  66. Susan says:

    Thank you so much for Godly encouragement! It's difficult, with multiples or one or two born at seperate times. I have become seriously selfish lately…probably becaue I was so upset we moved "here" and I did not have friends "here" for a long time – because I was too hard hearted to ask God for that. We had baby #2 in May and it has been a challenge. HOWEVER – God has really changed me and my heart. Am, I need Him to. I miss being close to God and my Husband the way it was when we married 4 years ago. But, we are changing and growing as a family of 4 and we need God and His plan for our marriage. In the past week, a relative's wife decided to leave him b/c he chewed his nails. I think there is something else going on there – discontentment with God and sin.

    Thank you fro shring your life – it helps me renew my mind and refresh my love for my husband.

    Thanks for the book resources too!

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